Maybe LM was too nice, so I am sort of freaking out of my mind thinking what to do with CH.  Maybe Andy was right, it is something so obvious that I don’t even need to think about.  He is totally uncaring.  LM is hiding something too.  Well withholding info especially some major ones like he got 2 kids. Grown ones too.  Sneaky, that is what he is.  His ex looks good typical long blonde hair and tan.  But really a tat too young for him.  Looking at Sue, I feel sorry for myself.  Maybe this is not my time yet.  I’ll have to wait and see. 

Drizzling today and I walk to the bus stop and of  course way too early there.  I didn’t know they don’t serve breakfast or lunch, gee, I was completely starve.  Lucky it was a short day and have a 30 min break.  I look all around and found that old dim sum take out re-opened next week,. Owow! Hallaluya. I look at the bakery on both side of the st and it looks sick.  One is definitely old looking bread, and the other one too expensive.  I went to Asmati co-op bakery which is expensive too.  I was disappointed at their pizza. It could be so good if they really cook it through the dough was raw… Like frozen pizza raw dough.  Because we were waiting .  The topping was so good and fresh, and thin crusted on $2 pipping hot better then old pastry at chinese bakery.  Elaine did just OK.  She got a bad break from the examiner.  He didn’t approve her ext.  Elaine could be very maticulous on something but total disregard on something else.  She concentrated on 2 spots and we based.  Then when the pt came back she saw a part of the floor was dug into.  So definitely someone think there is defective dentin remains.  Perio was crazy she used 2.5 bottle of water on calvertron. I was tired out.  Like ABel she wasn’t able to use me effectively. she can’t see when I suckion? I am miles away from her.  SHe looks and act nice but she is a cut throat really.  Betty wasn’t there, she must be mad.  that she really can’t go.   Power was out about an hr, and we were so worry that I have to do a long day tomorrow and short day today.  I want to end soon.

Talk to Mindy and heard Terry who is still single and dating much younger guys. Terry confessed that she is out of control can’t handle her own temper anymore.  She regret letting Micheal go.  SHe won;’t find someone that great anymore.  SHe got a house in Reno and Rio Vista to windsurf.  Poor Terry.  I wonder if she will ever be happy.

I need to spoil myself seriously!!

Dad losted his car key. His mind is going and his legs are weak too.  He made a detort from coming back from my sister’s.  He went to homedepo at colma, he must have droped it and didn’t know by the time he got to the car he can’t find it anymore although he asked the cashier.  He walked all the way to Colma BART too cheap to take Samtran.  Then walk all the way from BART home again too cheap to take the bus.  Mom wasn’t home so he waited.  Then he called Bro but he never picked up the phone.  I called too but he is like that.  So by 6: 45 he needs to get back the home depo to get the car.  He doesn’t know how to take Samtran, he waimapaient so he took 120 instead of 390 but 120 is a grand tour of Daly City and Colma going to all the malls, I mean all of them.  He finially came back by 9 and it was dark.  Lucky it drop him off by the store and not end up at the cemetary.  Even I got really scare with all the grave sites and cold wind blowing.  He is really really slow now a days.  Takes him so long to get ready for anything.  Just recluse at home does that to you, amd the mind is not excercising and solving problems and stubborn thinking he is right all the time stops you from thinking straight.

DGM has a lunch and learn.  It was Posh bagle.  It was sick.  I feel sick with heart burn from a chicken salad melt?  It tasted bad with soggy buns.  THey have crossantwish which is much better.  I will never go to Push Bagle.yuck

Jen and me will be on Thur. I think I will die but the schedule is light.  I was thinking that I will call in sick but then if DGM will take off after that I think I need the money. OK I am seriously want to spoil myself by getting that ebay topaz.  I need to get it.  Today was hectic but runs smoothly.  It was complicated and multiple fills and prep side by side.  with ERs all shows up and constand perio charting with the 2 hygient.  Jen is a bitch when Kim asks her more then once to chart.  SHe has really nothing to do just waiting around.  ANd a lot of things aren’t done, she is lazy and nozy and very irritating.  I will take my time and torture her more.  I think she makes life harder for us.  I can’t stand people who doesn’t do their job and doesn’t follow rules and orders.  I didn’t make up the rules it is the way things work.   

SUn definitely go to the farmer’s market to get a plant. Any plant to spoil myself since Ch never can.  He hasn’t call still and I don’t think I want to go out with him anymore.

I don’t want to be the bad guy but I know I have to choose between the 2 of them.  CH is trying to hold on, he was nice yesterday night.  He is a smart guy he sense things.  LM called me also and he wants to do a lot of things together, proposing a movie and Ch propose the same.  LM wants to cook for me, and give me more fruits……  He is the kind that showers you with things.  He is very, caring, I feel like I am a precious plant, and we both are nuts about plants.  He is more of a vege grower but he likes all things that grows.  I can over look that physical side. At least he is not in bad health like CH.  CH aches all the time.  I am just afraid that he is a serial dater, who collects woman.  I don’t want to be bog down so soon.  I don’t want to sleep with him because he showers me with kindness. 

I don’t want to be another bloosom that felt like in this book:     http://www.amazon.com/Sword-Blossom-Officers-Enduring-Japanese/dp/1594200890/ref=sr_1_1/002-0677884-7762402?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1182479276&sr=1-1

I make pourpori for Suz Linda and Eka.  I ran out of fresh ones for LInda, They are not dry all the way and needs to be dryer, and I was too lazy to harvest the rose geranium which is the most inteses smell.  I will make one that is so nice for Linda later on.  Actually, the 3 of them are much better then the bunch at UC.  There are lots of people who are selfish who only takes and never gives.  Yesterday this site is down, can’t write down what happen.  The insident was so rediculous that I laugh out of fustration because otherwise I would cry.  I think it upset Sandra so much.  It all started with the see;’s candies, that Dr. Ice let us eat.  OUr diet devil K let everyone have one, even the students.  I show Sandra that we have candies and I turn and left the floor.  I didn’t know what happen but K didn’t let Sandra have the piece of candy.  I remember Monique didn’t have one so I show her the box right after K let the building. Strange that no one wants a candy.  Bev told me about the candy.  God, All mighty, I was shock and I laugh.  Mon came and ask for the candy again because she didn’t want Sandra to feel alone, they want to show us they didn’t need our candy.  Mon and Leogh took one.  But it left a very bad feeling inside.  K is a church lady and all.  But she has a very bad heart.  I think it is more serious then I thought, Leong said it hurts Sandra’s feeling.  This place is full of crap.  I don’t want to be at a place like that.  I think I would be bitchy enough to hold K down.  I feel really bad about Sandra who is not a bad person without a mean bone in her body and she is afraid of K.  K is out to get her and Dr. C.

ABout DGM, she is going to expand in more ways then 1.  SHe is hiring another Dr.  and buying a very expensive crown making machine.  We have a lab bill of $75,000/yr. and this machine can easily top that bill.  We will be making gazzillion $.  If the office remodel the way she wants it, we will be very big.  SHe is extra nice to us, she wants to retain us for the new plans she have for the place.  We are actually making money?

My dental candidate passed his WREB. I can’t believe he passed because his english is so bad that he hardly undersand me.  We have a major communication problem plus he is very nutty.  I am happy that I don’t have to deal with him and sorry that he will be a manis to society.  He will be a bad ass dentist for sure.

 

life in the country away from the city hussles.  It is clean and calm like nothing else.

This is the place I want to get married!!! Did I say I have a great time???

I was bidding on that blue topaz at work.  I was totally hooked on that.  But I lost my bid.  Someone must have a maz and min on that item and I bid so many time but each time came back that I am out bidded.  SO it was useless to go over board on something friffless.  I haven’t even inspect the real thing, there maybe something I didn’t like.  I can only bid $20 on it.  It is a blue topaz , not anything extravagant like a diamomnd.  I was out bid by someone who buys romance novels.

It was an interesting day at OS no doublt.  Alex was there instead of Dan C.  Alex is even faster now and clinically better not as clumsy.  But I still feel uncomfortable with him because he rushes , he wants to do it before Dr C got into the room and when they work together it was funny how they fight over holding an instrument.  Both tugging it and neighter one let go of it. And he is a comedian.  A pt has a leg brace but he jump out of the chair and then undo his pants.  I was totally freak out and told everyone about it.  I dordge back and didn’t see the brace.  Alex was trying to close the door.  The pt is very gittery and can’t sit still like someone who is on speed.  I bet he is and didn’t sya a thing /  He rambles on like the guy who is clinically mentally ill.  Honest to god, I can’t tell them apart personality wise.  Last day for the ID4 Thank god it is over but the next batch is promised to be worse!

Maybe he had cut me off instead of me cutting him off.  He didn’t ring me today and I didn’t turn off the ringer.  Well, he is a real game player.  Lazy on acting like a bf.  How does he ever get to date anyone let alone married one is beyond me.  Maybe he will be nicer to those who can play lip service.  I am more frank now then I ever had before.  I don’t play nice.

LM made a lot of suggestions about what to do in the weekend.  At least he makes me feel like someone he is trying to date.  Instead of me running off to BART with a full bag of gorcery and my heart on a string.  I will never do that again. 

I try to shake off the saddness about loosing the $100 that I was going to buy the massager.  I just can’t believe that it is lost.  But I found a copy of MS magazine in the recycling bin that I haven’t even read.  So Dad is quick to dump things that is mine I got that part right.  I was staring at the ad on the st about room for rent for $550. It is with the yarn/corchet old lady on mission st.  Her place is scary dark and junky.  I am almost willing to room with a derange person then with my rents.

One bright note is I was plant lucky.  I got the plant that I thought was plumbago.  Now I got it I didn’t think it was because it has no sticky sappy steam.  I got 2 of that and one that looks like jasmine or gardenia.  I think it is a bigger jasimine.  Well, I have to take it to work because so far I have never able to make it grow at home. My pysch energy was in high gear when my conscious mind is wondering.  I am afriad to cross the st and get run over because my concentration was so low.  I am sad still about CH and my $100.

Dr Kopee thinks that I want to jump off the window or I am unhappy.  Because I was leaning out with my hands out there.  It was boring today this morning with little to do.  There are things on my mind that needs to resolve.  I am just not having any luck in the romance dept no matter how hard I work on it.  I am not lazy like May.  It is kind of a tough day to be over.  Dr C’s morning was crazy. S was with her.  Afternoon all quiet until 4 and then 4 rooms has pts.  This girl 24 from Mandocino is a mess.  She is clinically depress and sucidal.  She acts like a 12 yrs old, mean, demanding and drama queen.  She keeps insisting that she has no money and she drove 3 hrs to get here.  She wants it done now and wants IV sedation.  I don’t know why Dr. C wants to treat her.  It beats the hell out of me that garbage like this wasting our time.  She won’t take out her nose ring and more then a doz piecing. tongue ring when we did her a freee Pano X-ray and she cries when we ext.  We didn;t give her gas and they only pays $20.  OMG, she doesn’t even grateful.  when her grandpa gone, I have to fight back tears.  This kind of people piss me off.  This world is very unfair and trash like this living off of good people.  They are there to create problems and bad times for those who are here to make things better.  The OS resident Dan C. is so good and he is kind of nice.  I hope he will stay this way but of course when he makes good money he turns into Dr Mcdow.

Jason fails board.  E didn’t say a thing and he didn’t tell us either.  I think it is bad that people knows because we will ask and tease him.  He perf or decay remain.  Either way he loose 30 points.

CH was better last night I told him how he cuz at me for nothing.  He said he never cuz at me but at his job.  Yeah, but I have to hear the shit.  15 mins of blee blee bleep.

 

Next yr round of exam is already begun.  The next class already start bugging us about helping them.  God, I don’t even know their name, so let alone helping them.  I will not want someone stupid or bad temper.  Last class was lazy, there is no way that I want to help someone that pile on stuff for me to do.  I will just assist that day.  The most I will do is take alginate and some X-ray.  

The sad part is I don’t think there will be any changes in my life.  I think I will still here doing the same old thing I will take what I can get.

Jackie is gone.  She didn’t even leave me a note.  I thought she will at least make me a craft card.  I didn’t even get that.  Well, like I said before she won’t treat me as well as I treat her.  This place sucks.  No one is kind maybe Seline.  I know Laka only helps you and then come back and milk you.  SHe does that to Chewy.  Ask him to have dinner at her house and then push her sister or ask him a lot of favors. 

The mysterious plant at the $ store is a plumbago.  When I saw that at the farmer’s market, I was speechless.  I ran back to the $ store and all housplant was gone!!!!  I always want to grow that.  Hummmmmmm, the farmer’s market has a huge one $10 and I don’t want to lug a $10 pot to work.  It is just my luck and a lession well learn and now I can spot a plumbago anywhere without the sky blue flowers.

 

What did I do that makes Augusto not like me?  He likes me enough to ask me to work for him.  I think everything went well when we work together in the past.

He asks K’s niece to help, last min at board.  K pushed/sell her to Augusto.  SHe has no experience doing exam and I doublt she is any good in just assisting the basic.  Augusto ends up having to do everything himself.  Self pride prevented me from asking him why he didn’t pick me.  I was pretty disppointed.  I didn’t think he would take the board because he may go back to Miami.  Maybe he changed his mind.  It is a big hassle to have to do all the paper work, and keep track of time and how to manage patient.  It is almost impossible to do it all by yourself. If anyone can Augusto can do it.  Terry was upset when she came in.  She is one of those people who is too stubborn to function and follow rules.  Right here they let her off easy but there is a real world out there that at list has some boundry. 

Not being ask by Augusto is like not being ask to prom.  He missed out.  I would done really well with him.  I rather have him then the idoit of course.  At least clinically Augusto won’t mess up and much faster and not asking me to do weird things while he struggle through.  Well we both loose out because either one of us is willing to ask.  I heard Surissa got a bad assistnt too and have to finish another day. And Moni has to take over.  Rumor has it Bettie did 2 candidates.  It is possible if they only need her for the operatives.  ANd co-ordinate the endo part.  If each has a different endo session. Wow, she can make a lot of money.  Hummmm, Lucky we have no pt in the morning and I take it easy if that idiot makes me go back mon, I will be so stressed out.  Bettie said he lost something and went back and look.  I bet is his batch. I think he might lost that.  Well, he seems to leave things all over the place that is his fault too.  I can’t be his Mom.   This is a cut throat world.  Everyone is cutting everyone else’s money tree.  Either Bettie or Eugene refer the bad assistant to Surissa.  Gossip is in the air.  I see Augusto argue with K. And K knows how to handle Auguesto, but he may just shut up but he is mad definately.